CRASH MY HOUSE


Winter is breathing down my neck and that breath is frosty.

There is snow on my mountains.  Down where  I live (5,750 feet) it is fall a bit longer…  I now wear a hoodie outside and gaze up at the growing snow mass.  I need to look for my mittens.  

A freeze long since executed my garden.  Outdoor projects have ground to a seasonal halt. 

Entertainments are lovely and have a place.  I am not an anti-television snob.  Books and electronic diversions are not enough.   I unravel if I cannot be productive.

I need an indoor project.  I needn’t look far.  The inside of my little 325 square foot house doesn’t need “freshening up” and pillow fluffing… it’s a crapoire that needs flushing.

It needs well considered renovation.  I need storage, convenience and better utilization of limited space.  I did my best building this place DIY on a shoestring.  As a nine to fiver I took it to functional adequate.  I have time now (if not budget), improvements are overdue.

The extra TV I have been watching?  Mostly the home reno shows.  Here is how they work:

You go to the big box hardware store for a tube of caulk.  A handsome construction dude jumps out from behind a paint can display with a film crew and announces that they are going to CRASH YOUR HOUSE.   Timelines vary from show to show, but in three days or three weeks your home becomes a sea of high end Au Courant conveniences and appliances.  There are cut flowers everywhere for the “reveal”…

It goes from this:
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To this:
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Experience has taught I’d best start without prince charming in a hard hat.  I began with the bed.  I know people younger than my old mattress.  It was from a previous incarnation and Queen sized.  My home was approximately 25% bed.  I am attempting a Twin XL life style.  My landlord and I cut down and re-welded the old support frame to accommodate the new slender mattress. 

I have plans.  In the 60’s dormitory beds doubled as couches during the day by sliding under a padded front storage bin.  At night one wheeled them out.  I certainly need more storage.  Pictures are hard to find.  (In the late 60’s we forgot to take them):
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Nasty bed spread but good concept.
 
XL Twin bedding is more challenging to find than some sizes, but I found Dorm Co.  They specialize in XL Twin bedding and storage solutions, supplying millionaire quality for top ramen student budgets.   What a deal!

I selected a new comforter from the Plush Softest Ever line.  With 5 solids to choose from I went with black.  White is impractical where I live, blue is boring, the magenta was over the top… 

The bed project is coming along.  The new comforter is installed.  It is indeed luxuriously soft to the hand.  Surprisingly it has a crushed velvet sheen.   Shudder…  

Without realizing it I have chosen a motif and it seems too late to turn back.   Retro dormitory whore house it is…

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